I needed you to stand up for me. To stand up for our uniqueness. For the unbounded love. For the good in me, and the good in you. I needed you to stand strong, ready to block with a mouth that would eat every tasteless word spoken.
I needed you at my strongest and my weakest. When I crumbled inside with pain. Watching my father’s illness take over. Sleepless nights, worrying, crying. Feeling the emptiness and detachment from the known. Like an orphan. No past to connect with. No place to belong. Adrift… I am. One woman.
What will it be? My legacy? My family’s generations? Stories of grandparents and their grandparents told by me? At the age of 37, will I be the only connection to my children’s roots? At age 37, will I be the sole bearer of my family’s dream? I am not ready for this. I am so not ready for this… I needed a hand. I needed comfort and so much tender love… But what I needed wholeheartedly, unquestionably, feverishly was you the most…
Yours Truly,
A Not Such Independent Woman After All.