Sunday mornings have become pivotal in relation to my personal development.
I woke up remembering an amazing dream. And what follows marks another paramount “moment-of-truth.”
The Dream:
It’s dusk. Grassy field. Tall leafy trees crown the sky. People. I know them, but cannot connect a name to the face. Energetically they are of acquaintance. The main hero in the dream is myself and my friend. This is about us.
We are engaged in a conversation. And like always it’s easy and intriguing. Abruptly my friend says something that effected me in a negative way. And I simply turn around and walk away. I am not upset or hurt. I just need to walk away. As I distance myself, I wonder if he will follow, to at least ask what is wrong. But he doesn’t. Instead, he mystically appears sitting on the grass a few feet ahead of me. He is looking straight forward. I sit next to him. In silence, we wait. Then, an energy pushes us to rest. While laying down, I feel the heaviness of his personal journey. I feel his life transition’s emotional effect. I want to be there for him. I need to be there for him. Right there… next to him… He moves closer and our legs intertwine. It’s comfortable and relaxing. None of it is sexual, but purely positive intentions from one soul to another. And then, I realize my purpose. I realize my importance, and relation. To be a friend.
With or without, we are always connected.
I wake up.
…
I sat at the edge of my bed, smiling and reasoning with the content of the dream. I’ve known this truth, but when a dream confirms, you know it’s not just the mind’s or ego’s expression, it comes from another source. A more reliable place.
My eyes are open. I begin to think. Drifting to the past. To the now. To the unpredictable future. I’m thinking. Thinking. and Thinking. And that’s when I feel it coming. Tightening of that most gentle organ. I hold it. My hand holds on to it. Padding it. Calming it down. It hurts… Knowing the truth, makes no difference when you can’t do anything about anything. My place is where it is. This ain’t a dream. This is reality.
I get up. Upset and saddened… I need to go for a run. I get dressed. Everyone is asleep. It’s already warm and sticky outside. I stretch towards the trees. I balance. I center. And I go… I run. I run for some time, but not too long. I want to continue my workout inside. I have my free weights and music in the basement. That’s all I need… But instead of lifting; I begin to dance. I dance, and I weep. The energy is moving through, nice and slow. Making it’s way out of my body. Freeing its self. Go. Go. Be free… A big mirror hangs on the wall. I stare at my reflection moving. I see something. I come closer. Really close. I see a face. Eyes. Lips… I’m staring at someone. Really examining her features. Now, I look deeply into her eyes. And then I feel it. I feel her looking back at me. And I begin laughing… I feel the other’s presence. Her soul. I can see her. Like really See her and Feel her… And she’s Awesome!! I love her. An amazing spirit. She is complete, and free, and perfect just the way she is… I love her! Then, the energy embodied me again, and I breathe her in. Oh, baby you’re home. This body- your home. This life- a gift… Stay and love it!
An out of body experience.
……
I keep on dancing in full happiness of the moment. Of being Me. And I know I’ve got this, finally. I’ve got a good strong grip on this.- Me and my life. How amazing!
Transformation. Growth. Development. I don’t intend ever stopping the process. The “big white house” in the Catskills, as someone called it once, will be visited often. I couldn’t have cleansed like this without it. I couldn’t have gained such understanding of self with out it. And so the journey precedes. Discovering. Observing. Experiencing. Seeking.
Yours Truly,
-An Altered Traveler